For a true wine lover, you’re probably going to have to put a bit of preparation into getting their gift together, and you haven’t got long to go. So, since it’s getting pretty cold out there and nesting has set in, we bashed together this special guide to all things wine for that vineyard vixen or magnum-managing man.
Because we’re trying our best to make this really simple for you, we’ve even categorised them, so really all you need to do is get your card at the ready and order that shit on next day. You’ve only a week!
The Cheap Game Changer
This is going to be so much better than grabbing a bottle of shitty supermarket’s own brand, and will actually look like you’ve given a toss about what your wine loving wonder might actually want. By all means chuck a bottle of their favourite in as well: it is Christmas after all. Clever construction complements convenience with this Le Creuset on bottle aerator. Pour perfect, drip-free, and fully aerated and oxidated wines; optimising flavor and quality.
With free postage right now, you can still get this genius little gift ordered in time for the wine lover in your life to open on the day. £12.95
The Physics Bender
OK, I’ll admit that this looks like a glorified crow bar. And similar to a crow bar, it basically ages things, although in a much less violent way. Basically, it’s comprised of two metals stuck together. You essentially stick it in your wine, changing it through its various seasons in just a few seconds. Its unique process reveals the qualities of your wine; measuring its ageing potential. Basically, whether it’s in the glass for one, two or three seconds determines the variety of palates any one wine has to offer, so you can try the same wine through different stages.
The Social Wine Lover
Give your wine loving friend the gift that gives twice by choosing a wine tasting evening from home. This way, they get to sample some different wines and usually get a bottle thrown in too – all from the comfort of their own home. What’s best about this is that the variety of tasting sessions around tend to be for up to 4 people, which means it’s a great social gift, allowing you to spend more time with the wine lover in your life! Pieroth are doing tasting sessions for up to 4 people at just £79, which makes it less than £20 a head. And you can get your own cheeses in to make the night a success.
The Appreciator of Fine Things
A classic gift of luxury for the luxury wine lover in your life, Laurent-Perrier have released the Grand Siècle gift set this Christmas. Consisting of two oenological champagne glasses, specially designed to serve the accompanying bottle of the prestigious Grand Siècle. Available from leading wine specialists from £135
The pretentious Twat
If you know anyone in your life who even vaguely resembles Markus, the second reviewer on this page, then you should probably reassess your fucking friend group post haste. However, if this pretentious prick happens to be, say, like your Dad or an uncle you have to endure, then by all means fork out the needlessly pricey $299 (£190) for this gift. It basically does the same things as the Le Creuset aerator but using compressed gas and a needle. But it looks super pretentious. And some people love that shit.